Wall Around His Heart
by BiteyMadPixie
Summary: Levi has never been good at letting people in. One girl changed that. Her death will change him forever.
1. Introduction

_Intro: __Wall Around His Heart_

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Levi didn't cry. He never cried. Wouldn't. But this time, after the one person he loved was gone…. Maybe he could allow himself to feel… something, anything.

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People often looked at the solemn Captain with respect, and something like fear. His gaze was almost never met, and he was okay with that. Okay with being alone. "I don't need anyone," he told himself, but that was far from the truth, and he knew it. Levi wasn't used to people. Okay that's a lie, he isn't used to people who are nice to him. The Survey Corps was full of dedicated people, but his own team had the best… There were a few guys, 'dirtbags,' he thought, but there was this girl… Now Levi had never been 'interested,' per se in relationships, but this girl… everything about her made him want to break that hard shell that encased his heart, his soul, and bare everything he was. She kept his gaze, and _smiled _at him. Someone smiled at _him_. No one ever had before…

The two became close, and got… ahem… involved for a bit. He hadn't been happier. Levi almost smiled. She kept her quiet vigil over his heart, and for once, he didn't care.

Everything in the Survey Corps changed, and quickly too. The wall was breached, and a 'new,' being came to exist.

A young man named Eren.

This boy was supposedly the secret to it all.

He was earnest, and kind (if a little odd). Levi didn't dislike Eren, (at least not as much as the other males in their team), but _she_ was giving the young man a lot of attention… Jealousy was a new feeling for Levi. He had never been close enough to anyone to treasure them, and so he wandered their HQ with an irritated attitude, ordering Eren to clean more than was necessary. She laughed quietly as she helped.

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**Okay, was it awful? Its more like an intro, and this is the first thing I've written... but could someone tell me what they think? Please? Thank you! More soon If you'd like. hm...**

**-Pixie**


	2. Chapter 1

_The Wall Breaks Down_

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He fought alongside the new girl, a promising half-Asian girl by the name of Mikasa. She was quiet like Levi, and desperate to get Eren back.

Levi tried to forget everything that had happened that horrible day. The comrades that died trying to protect them, the seasoned veterans who had seen more than enough fights for a lifetime, and even the new recruits… they all were dying around him. What were they fighting for? Levi didn't care anymore. His best reason… no, his only reason to _want_ to survive was gone now…

After the fight was over, and had things calmed down, Levi turned into a human statue. Barely responsive, he wandered the edges of the temporary camp. "_I wonder how the brat is doing,_" he thought in passing.

Emotions that were alien to him filled his being. "_What is this… I'm not used to this feeling… What is it?" _

Thinking that he wanted to be alone Levi, the antisocial person he is, went to a small grove of trees, a fair distance away from the rest of the camp, and leaned up against one of the trees. He must have been out of it because a while later, while he was staring dazedly into the trees, a young man with bright eyes and dark brown hair walked up to him.

"What's wrong," Eren asked quietly, "is it... _Her_?"

Levi was silent, back turned, and had an expression that would turn the bravest of men to stone.

Eren kept talking despite the probable personal risk, "You should talk about it. Why won't you? You are a person, and people need to grieve! Please talk about it." He paused, expecting the captain to respond, with anything, but still Levi was quiet.

"You never let anyone in," he stopped then, and shakily continued, "only _her_… You don't even let me help."

Levi turned angrily, the first bit of emotion he had showed anyone in hours, and said icily to the Eren, "And why should I? You're just a… a…" his voice broke then, and shocked them both, and for the first time since _her_ death, the first time ever, Levi cried. Just one tear first, quietly, and he lost control, and started to fall to his knees. Even covering his mouth, he couldn't stop the soul-wrenching sobs.

Eren was shocked. Never before had he seen his Captain show so much emotion. The silence was interrupted only by Levi's muffled crying, and Eren hesitantly approached his Captain.

Falling to his knees in front of Levi, Eren quietly reached across the small space to touch the man's shoulder. That light touch broke whatever he had held back all day and he reached back with one hand to grasp Eren's shirt with a vise-like grip. The two were quiet for a moment before Levi said, "she's go-…dead… And I didn't get to tell her…" Eren listened quietly and his voice was sympathetic as he answered, "What do you need?"

Silence then- "Just let me… stay like this… for a minute."

"Yeah. Sure. If that's what you need."

Once Levi had calmed down and dried his face with a clean kerchief (borrowed from Eren), Levi had resumed his usual cold demeanor. Levi's eyes where hard and icy once again.

Eren smiled ruefully at the quick change and the shorter man glared at him, "You dare say anything to the others… and I'll see that you… get in an accident." Eyes softening for a moment, before becoming as cold as ever, Levi pushed past the younger men.

"Yes, Captain," he said quietly, and followed.

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**Hey! How was it? Let me know what you think.**

**-Pixie**


	3. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

Shifter's Sorrow

It was some time after Levi's little... episode, and a lot had happened. Many more loyal members of the Survey Corps had died and Eren had fought with Mikasa many times. The quiet girl was always lurking at the edge of Eren's vision, which annoyed him to no end, and although he loved his adopted sister, he hated having her babysit him all the time. He thought he could take care of himself.

It was evening now, Eren and Mikasa had returned to the little castle that the Captain kept so meticulously clean. They had arrived there the night before, and, much to Mikasa's irritation, were forced to haul their tired bodies off their horses and clean the rooms before sleeping in them. Well, she thought, I'll get used to it eventually. If Eren can, then I will have to.

Levi hadn't changed since his spot of trouble, so when Eren was asked (ordered) to dust, it was no surprise. The surprising bit was that he was expected to dust everything. It was a daunting task, because the castle had been abandoned for some years, and being so large with so many windows.

To keep himself from mindlessly completing the task, he tried to remember what had happened to him in that grove of trees. Levi had reached out to him like a drowning man reaches for a life preserver. Eren paused in his dusting for a second to better relive the moment, when he heard a sharp sound from behind him that caused him to jump. It was a voice, a harsh voice,

'Hey Brat! Don't you dare slack off!'

Eren turned his green eyes towards his Captain's darker ones. HE met the narrowed gaze defiantly,

'Well Captain,' he began, 'are you going to work us to death? I haven't had a chance to get any decent rest yet...'

he trailed of then hastily added, 'Sir.'

'Bingo,' the shorter (but more menacing) man stated darkly, 'That's exactly how I work... and besides, I can't work if the house isn't clean.'

'You sound like a new wife,' Eren muttered under his breath.

'What was that?' Levi said loudly.

(gulp) 'N-nothing, Captain,' Eren said.

_Woah, Levi is actually trying to make us hate him_. Eren understood why he had to help out, and with so few people around after that last fateful trip, it was hard to look at this new place without remembering the people they'd lost. Even so, The Captain's OCD tendencies were a bit hard to keep up with.

Levi 'harrumph'-ed him and left the room, which worried Eren more than anything else at the moment, because Levi would have, just weeks ago, threatened a beating. Eren shuddered and dusted faster.

When Eren had finished with as much dusting as physically possible, he sought out his companions. In the new place it was hard, and it took some time, but when he finally did find them, he was disappointed. He found an irritated Jean and a 'get-off-my-back' Mikasa, neither of them noticed him quietly slip in to listen to them bicker. He endured the torment as long as he could (about fifteen minutes), tuning them out, and listening to Jean talk crap on him (why Jean was jealous of him was a mystery, but it seemed the only explanation to his behavior).

After a while, Mikasa noticed him, and sat annoyingly close, whispering profanity at the light haired boy under her breath. Her dark eyes were brooding beneath her short, silky, black hair. She seemed angry at Jean simply because he hated Eren. He slid away from her angrily. _She's always trying to protect me,_he thought bitterly, and turned his furious gaze to his 'sister'. She flinched under his hostile gaze, and they both kept silent for a second. Abruptly feeling upset, he stood up, and felt the hot prickle behind his eyes, he made his way drunkenly to the stairs, hearing Jean call to him rudely, and head to his room (which was really just a glorified cell).

He should be used to it.

The fear, hate, malice, and concern emanating from everyone he knew. The fact that he was a Human-Titan shifter was enough to frighten most grown men with any semblance of sanity.

_Don't cry, don't cry,_ he chanted to himself, _not yet, not here. _

As he stumbled down the stairs, eyes blurring with tears, he tried to forget everything that had happened to him in the last few years. The horrific images had been etched into his tired mind and made it hard for him to forget anything.

Fear has a way of vividly burning things into the mind and Eren was no stranger to fear. Although he couldn't remember most of what happened after he shifted, just hearing about it made him sick...

Finally down the stairs, Eren fell onto his bed, just as the worst of the giant wave of emotion hit him. He tried to stifle the sobs as best he could, because he didn't want the others to see him any more vulnerable than they already had. Eren allowed himself to dwell on the self imposed misery and loneliness, _why is it always me? Who decided it had to be this way? What makes me so 'special'?_

Countless questions surfaced in his mind, drowning him, and Eren cried. He cried as if his world was falling apart right in front of him. Just as his sorrow reached its climax, he heard a noise, a soft tap, as if someone had stopped at the top of the dingy stairs to witness his misery.

Eren called out, 'who's there?' his voice cracked, and he sounded raspy.

There was no answer to his query but the sound of more steps downward being taken. At this point Eren was too upset to care anymore and didn't bother to wipe the tears from his face to look to see who the visitor was. A voice rang out, one that was stiff and unused to displays of emotion, the last voice Eren expected to hear.

His Captain spoke quietly, 'uh so... what happened...?' the end of the question seemed forced, and through the haze of grief for everything that had gone wrong in his life, Eren was surprised. He'd never heard Levi ask a question like that. Unable to answer, he looked up from the bed- up at Levi who had cried for Her- and started crying anew.

Startled, Levi drew nearer, 'Hey y-... Eren... What... What can I do?'

Once again, Eren was shocked. This was so unlike the captain, so unexpected that Eren's paranoid, emotional brain immediately suspected some ulterior motive. He hesitated again, and Levi seemed to understand why.

'No, Eren,' he said roughly, 'you... were there for me when I had no one. Do you... need anything?'

Eren coughed and hesitantly looked at Levi, 'water,' he croaked, 'but-'

'Okay, I'll be-'

Levi stopped as Eren's had reached out and grasped the hem of his shirt.

'No, please, don't leave me.' Eren's voice was barely a whisper, and as he spoke, his hand tightened on Levi's shirt. The Captain stood rigid for a moment before sitting on the edge of the bed, next to the crumpled shifter's form.

Levi looked cautiously at the stairwell before hesitantly placing a warm hand on Eren's shoulders, awkwardly patting him in a clumsy attempt to comfort the younger man. At the contact, Eren's tense form befan to soften, and, Levi noticed with relief, his crying was beginning to stop.

Eren moved closer to his captain, now clutching him tightly with both hands, and, after some time, drifted into sleep.

_Aah..._ Levi thought dryly, _what am I doing? This stupid brat needs someone, but why me? I can't get involved... the last time I-_

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well? What did you think? Let me know! PS- I had some huge issues getting this new computer to stop throwing out the dialogue just because it is in parenthesis. So I hope you'll read the fourth one I've tried to publish thus far. /(/./)/ Sorry. -Pixie


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